Evil Laugh

It's only a matter of time before she takes over the world.

Hey! It's okay Tuesday!

It's Okay to...

Freshly Sharpened Pencils

• Be ridiculously excited that I got a $10 off gift card in the mail from Staples. I love office supplies!
• Nearly flip my lid when I saw I had also gotten an email from Staples with 50% coupons. 50% off items + $10 off gift card = an extremely happy B.  ""Don't you love Indiana in the spring? It makes me wanna buy school supplies. I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew your name and address. On the other hand, this not knowing has its charms" (Adapted quote from one of my favorite movies! Name that movie for 1,000 brownie points!)
• Feed your family pancakes with sprinkles and frosting for National Pancake Day.
• Wish the "Know-It-All Riley" stage had passed at age six, but unfortunately it's still going strong. I'm thinking it will only last another 6 months or so...
• Think it's very neat that my friend is being induced tomorrow - a Leap Year baby!

Check out what else is okay at Airing My Dirty Laundry!

Resolutions I Should Have Made

Dear Me,

I know you don't really make resolutions. But maybe we should consider making just one? Who cares that it's almost March, this is important to your mental health. See, I've noticed that you tend to do something that only seems to make you mad and ruin your afternoon. You insist on reading comments that people post online. Particularly the ones of a political nature. Or even worse, you read articles you know are going to tick you off. I mean, did you think you would benefit from going to a website called "Mr. Conservative" and reading how Michelle Obama is ruining our lives by encouraging our incredibly obese country to not eat King Sized candy bars?

You can't help it that people are stupid don't agree with you. The great thing about this country is that they are able to spew their ignorance express their opinion without fear of being arrested! Your snarky comments, no matter how intelligent and witty, don't help and certainly don't change anyone's opinion. You just offend more people, cause a bigger rift, and nothing good ever comes from it.

"When leftist pundits speak of the scourge of Republicans and how stupid they are, they are talking about my family and a lot of people I know, and like. When the blow holes on the right talk noxious tripe about hunting liberals and the such, they’re talking about me, my family and a lot of people I know, and like."  - Collin Hinds 

So how about we stop reading and start doing something? Try to remember that showing people you care is more important that proving that you are right.

And you should probably stop writing letters to yourself.

Love,
Me

Hey, It's Okay Tuesday!

It's Okay to...

Girl Scouts - turning girls evil one little cookie at a time.

• Support the Girl Scouts. I think it's every one's right to choose which organizations they want to support. But to come out and call the Girl Scouts a "radical organization" just makes you look like a nut job and a bully picking on 8 year old girls.
• Love eBay. I hadn't bid on anything in forever, but the older kids needed new coats. I could not find any winter coats in my local stores (unless they are hidden under the piles and piles of bikinis IN FEBRUARY) so I went to the Internet. Brenna got a pink Columbia coat and Riley got a blue Nike coat - both big enough to last them through next winter and I only paid $20 a piece! Including shipping costs!
• Desperately want to get rid of some of my kids toys without them knowing. They have so many they don't even know they have. If I ask about them, they will only then remember it as their most favorite toy EVER. Is it wrong to get rid of stuff without them knowing?
• Be ashamed of myself for letting Brenna watch the Bratz Baby movie on Netflix. I thought it would be okay since they are BABIES. But even the babies are dressed like streetwalkers! No one is safe!
• Think it's wonderful there is a show called, "My Cat from Hell". I'm certain every cat in the entire world should be on that show. There are no good cats, only ones that haven't clawed your eyes out...yet.

Go see what else is okay at Airing My Dirty Laundry!

Mother's Little Helper

Before Riley was born, I read Brooke Shield's book "Down Came The Rain" about post-partum depression and it really ticked me off. I had always kind of felt that PPD was fake. Everyone gets the blues, but you shake it off and move forward. And she's freaking Brooke Shields for crying out loud! What does she have to be sad about?

And then Riley was born.  And things changed. I changed. I wasn't really weepy, just incredibly overwhelmed. I could not cope. I described it as feeling like I was constantly on the "I Love Lucy" episode where they are making chocolate and the candy just keeps coming and coming until she and Ethel finally just start shoving them in their mouths, shirts, everywhere. Life just kept coming at me and I was running out of places to hide.

I also became obsessed with death. Not in a "goth, wear all black and journal in cemetaries" kind of way. I knew I was going to die soon. I could just feel it. Every intersection, I would brace myself for the car I knew would slam into me. I would hold on to the steering wheel extra hard going over bridges to try and prevent my car from veering off the road. Even taking the trash out held it's own risks because I knew someone was out there waiting in the dark for me. I wasn't afraid, just prepared.

It eventually got to the point where I was convinced Jeff and Riley deserved a better wife/mom. I thought about just running away, but I knew Jeff would do everything he could to find me. (Damn him for loving me. :) ) If I was permanently gone, they could move on faster. Jeff would find a new wife and Riley was a baby so he wouldn't even remember me. And that's when I knew something was seriously wrong with me.

I was put on an anti-depressant and I'm certain it saved my life. I just recently felt comfortable enough to wean myself off of it (with my doctor's instructions). I still get overwhelmed, but it's temporary. Normal mom stuff. My emotions feel kind of raw. I have a quick temper and can cry easily. But I know how to manage it now. I don't feel like those emotions control me.

Posting about this has been on my heart for sometime, but I honestly didn't want to do it. I'm ashamed and embarrassed about it. I don't want people to look at me and think, "That's the crazy one." (And not because of my crazy-good dance moves)  But I think that's why I should post this. There is such an awful stigma surrounding mental issues. Maybe by talking about my own struggle, someone will recognize themselves in it and get help.

Let's rock this (crazy) joint.

Four Eyes

   A few years ago I was at a store and a girl came up to me and asked if my name was Bethany. It turns out she went to elementary school with me and remembered me from first grade! Apparently I hadn't changed much, which was a bit disturbing, because in first grade I had silver capped teeth and coke bottle glasses. I'd like to think I'd pretty-d up a bit!

I couldn't find pictures of me as a youngster in my glasses - but I imagine I was this cute.

My coke-bottle glasses have always been something I like to keep hidden. My dirty little vision secret. I have amblyopia - or a lazy eye. I've had thick glasses since I was four and some of you may even remember my patch-wearing days! (I wore a patch in kindergarten to help strengthen my weak eye) My left eye is the bum eye - I can see out of it, but not well and if I'm tired it can droop a bit. I've always HATED wearing my glasses because they magnify my eyes so much and it's really embarrassing. No one has ever said anything to me, but I always think people are startled by the hugeness of my eyes. I joked with Jeff that I must look like a bush baby.

I recently went through my last pair of contacts and couldn't order another pair without an exam. BUMMER. I can't get into the opthamologist until next week, so I've been rocking my glasses for a while now. Not just any glasses though. I've had these for a few years and they have taken quite a beating. My kids have loved to rip them off my face, so the result is one ear piece that is super glued on, and the other is actually an ear piece off of one of Jeff's old pairs of glasses!

So if you see me before I get my new contacts, don't be startled and please be kind. Glasses make you look smarter anyway, right?

Hey! It's Okay, Tuesday!

It's Okay to...

• LOVE Zynga's word games. Words With Friends, Hanging With Friends, and my new favorite Scramble With Friends. But I'm really bad at them. I'm convinced my purpose is to make the other player feel good about their word skills. YOU'RE WELCOME.
• Also love the Lady Gaga channel on Pandora. It gets me through those afternoon slumps.
• Not even notice that M.I.A. flipped the bird during the half-time performance.
• Secretly hope that Jeff gets me Sweatin' to the Oldies for Valentine's Day. Workout tapes are not the usual romantic gift I know - but friends keep talking about it and it makes me want to do them!

I leave you with this:



Head over to Airing My Dirty Laundry to see what else is okay!